June 16, 2016 (Thursday)
In browsing news sites on the internet recently, I saw in passing several blurbs or headlines about swallowing gum. The wording is catchy, designed to pique our interest in a subject not very interesting in itself. Finally, I read a few of the paragraphs connected to the blurbs and since I was not expecting to learn anything, I was not disappointed.
In reading the various stories, I learned that at least one death was thought to be caused by swallowing gum, that people have developed digestive problems so bad that surgery was necessary because they swallowed gum, etc. etc. Continuing to read beyond the first paragraph of these stories revealed that these things never happened because almost everything can be explained in more than one way.
When I was a kid, I don’t remember being warned that swallowed gum remains in the stomach for seven years, as some parents said. If I remember things as they really happened, I was told, “Don’t swallow gum!” and that was that. Of course, almost everyone who chews gum accidentally swallows it at least once, and finds that for all practical purposes, nothing at all happens.
To be sure, gum is not digestible. It is resin, and the body has never learned how to handle it, so the stomach just turns it loose and so do the intestines. If you swallow your gum, forget about it. There is almost zero possibility for it to cause you any kind of problem. If you put a whole package in your mouth and somehow manage to get it down your throat, you will probably have some difficulties. Even water will kill you in sufficient quantities.
The “catchy” wording of headlines has become an art among editors and journalists. They’re not funny anymore because they are contrived. Yes, it was funny when it was accidentally worded weirdly, but if it’s weird by design it’s an insult to our intelligence. If you see an article about swallowing gum, read it if you must, but you won’t learn anything you don’t already know about it. Same with most “weird” headlines.