Betcha can’t eat just one
May 11, 2012 (Friday)
Every once in a while I get the feeling that I must have been under a rock, on a space trip or just plain unconscious, because I have suddenly become aware of the existence of something that most people already know about. I’m talking about chocolate-covered bacon. You may have known all about it, but I just heard about it today.
References on the internet date back to 2005. Perhaps that is what bothers me most about this sudden awareness. People in many places have been eating this for seven years and I’ve been left out. I won’t be visiting my cardiologist until September but I want to be sure and ask him if he has some good recipes for chocolate-covered bacon, or another delicacy called candied bacon, or even chicken-fried bacon. I can hardly wait for his answer.
If someone finds that he is allergic to this delicious addition to his diet, perhaps he can substitute pure grease in a prepared syringe suitable for injection at any time of day. Substituting only one word In a famous quotation from a former governor, “Cholestorol today, cholesterol tomorrow, cholesterol forever!” Or, if you prefer editing a Bible verse: “Eat chocolate-covered bacon, drink lots of sugar-filled sodas, and be merry, for tomorrow you die” (or maybe tonight).
Someone listed bacon ice cream; deep-fried bacon; chocolate-dipped bacon; bacon-wrapped hot dogs filled with cheese; brioche bread pudding smothered in bacon sauce; hard-boiled eggs coated in mayonnaise encased in bacon (called the ‘heart attack snack’); bacon salt; bacon doughnuts, cupcakes and cookies; bacon mints; fast food’s six strips of bacon mounded atop a half-pound cheeseburger; and a barbecued meat brick composed of 2 pounds of bacon wrapped around 2 pounds of sausage.”
Here and now I vow never to eat any of these..unless offered by a good friend.